the awesome/terrifying freedom

so james picked wes. how touching. too bad he doesn't really like wes. as soon as they get back from that vacation (which they've probably already had) james will become the gay aaron buerge; bland on screen, super-mega slut-machine off screen. soon to be appearing on alternate wednesdays at the gaiety theatre.

franklin. hmm. interesting guy. wow does he love himself. 'out' did an article recently on straight guys who like to go to gay bars because they get hit on more and it makes them feel powerful. frankin and dan are these kind of guys.

what is most irking is franklin's notion that he 'now knows what it's like to be in the closet.' uh, not quite homeboy. you know what it's like to be in the closet just as much as that wall street banker who said during the blackout 'i have a deeper appreciation of the struggles of the homeless,' understands poverty. the show may have created an environment in which a 'secret' needed to be kept, but a huge aspect of closethood was still left out. franks, try living an entire childhood and adolescence of doubt and self hatred. try balancing the counterweights of social acceptance and self denial with self actualization and ostracism. try having your first junior high-level sexual relationship in your mid-twenties. try having mind-blowing butt-sex for the first time and not being able to tell anyone about it. hmm. that's probably not a gay-exclusive experience. butt sex for straight men is the new frontier. you really should try it franklin, you really should. or dan. try it with dan. you might want to make an archival video of that too.

bill mahr says that 'lesbian kisses are no longer shocking.' so true. roseanne did it ages ago. what's shocking is just how much coverage the madonna/britney kiss got. what's even funnier is how absolutely nothing has been said about madge's identical kiss with christina aguilera. i guess it's because we've come to expect this sort of behavior from xtina, who flings her dirty self about like a homo in a 70's bathhouse. we know britney's no saint, but she claims to be, so any evidence of hypocrisy makes front page news.

i can't wait for the day when open mouth straight guy on straight guy make outs are used as publicity stunts. 'american pie 2' sorta did this, but played it as disgusting and awful. no. i want full britney/xtina/madonna action with, oh, hows about justin/ricky martin/marky mark?

of course the problem is that girl/girl kissing has the effect of doubling the participants' femininity, where a guy/guy kiss has the effect of halving the participants' masculinity. but as women gain more power, this perception may start to crumble, and boys will start mouth gymnastics for the same reasons straight girls do: to practice and to turn on the opposite sex. so girls, seize your power and demand that your boys do the tonsil tango.