the awesome/terrifying freedom

out here, somewhere, figuring it all out.

i have no calves

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i've never had calves. i've done those agonizing exercises and was never able to get calves.

did you see that mtv special with the guy who got calf implants? the guy who was like 'i'm totally perfect except for my calves, dude. i gotta do it for the ladies'? that guy? remember him?

and how he had to use a walker for a month?

and remember how happy he was with the surgery and you honestly could not tell any difference between the before and after pics?

yeah, he does gay porn now.

yummy. i want calf implants too!

1 responses to “i have no calves”

  1. Anonymous s 

    you know, I have to say that the dinosaur oatmeal grossed me out more.

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