the awesome/terrifying freedom

yesterday sam and i had a nice dinner with some of his friends at a new restaurant in santa monica called rustic canyon. as we were leaving, jj abrams and his wife were arriving, handing the car keys over to the valet. one day.. one day jj will be like 'hey joe, what's good on the menu? oh, and what should happen in the 5th season of lost?'

i'm working the required personal intro to my submission for 'on the lot.' i can't believe i'm applying to a reality show. recording footage of myself, it's sadly aparent how i might appear on tv. i pause a lot when i speak. i 'um' a lot. i jerk my head around. i speak in a very, um, forced manner. i seem like an asshole. maybe i can pitch myself as a really really annoying villian character. it feels soo skeezy to even be applying for a reality show, especially one on FOX. i imagine myself horrifically falling into every reality show contestant cliche - crying. i think that's my biggest fear is that i will cry, that i will sob uncontrollably when i am booted. i think my strategy will be to edit my mistakes together in one deeply humiliating clip, rather than the tempting approach, made up of my good takes.