the awesome/terrifying freedom

let me tell you a story.

once upon a time (yesterday) i decided to go to the really gay gym in chelsea.

the really gay gym in chelsea is more about walking around naked in the locker room than it is about working out. i'm totally serious. the locker room was packed. people everywhere. imposible to get a locker. the weight room: empty. it's kind of disgusting, but i'm kind of disgusting, and i'm occasionally compelled to go. mostly it's because there are too many straight people at my gym and after awhile it starts to grate on my nerves. eventually the gay gym will be too gay and i'll happily return to the straight gym. but for now i'm happy to be surrounded by some fellow feys.

anyway. i went to the gay gym, and there he was. working his abs. doing leg raises. looking amazing. sweating up a storm.

lee tergesen.

also known as 'beecher' from 'oz.'
also known as the first guy charlize theron kills in 'monster.'
also known as the lucky bastard who got to make out with chris meloni naked.

later in the locker room i said to him:

me: um. uh. um. is that. is that locker um. taken?

lee tergesen: yeah. that's mine.

me: oh. ha ha. no. um. i mean uh that one. behind you.

lee tergesen: oh. no it's not.

me: (hopeful) oh, okay.

lee tergesen: but there's water in the bottom.

me: (despondent) oh, okay.

and thus ended my conversation with beecher. i'll hold onto that for years.. at least until i get to have a similar conversation with chris meloni.

what's lee doing in the gay gym? surely he knows he's a sort of icon to us homos. did he just feel the need to feel iconic for an evening a la sally field's trip to the mall with whoopi goldberg in 'soapdish?'